| Wit - the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out. |
| When humor goes, there goes civilization. |
| When a thought takes one's breath away, a grammar lesson seems an impertinence. |
| What a strange world this would be if we all had the same sense of humor. |
| This I conceive to be the chemical function of humor: to change the character of our thought. |
| There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them. |
| There is no defense against adverse fortune which is so effectual as an habitual sense of humor. |
| There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God. |
| The secret to humor is surprise. |
| The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance. |