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![The salesman at the furniture store told me, `This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.`<br/>
I said, `Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?`]()
Upload to Facebook The salesman at the furniture store told me, `This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.`
I said, `Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?` -
![Rainy days are so good. You can open all the windows and drink a cold beer in your underwear.<br/>
Not sure why my Uber driver is threatening to call the cops!]()
Upload to Facebook Rainy days are so good. You can open all the windows and drink a cold beer in your underwear.
Not sure why my Uber driver is threatening to call the cops! -
![My uncle has 2 Dobermans called Rolex and Timex.<br/>
They are watch dogs!]()
Upload to Facebook My uncle has 2 Dobermans called Rolex and Timex.
They are watch dogs! -
![Did you hear about the big Lego sale?<br/>
People were lined up for blocks!]()
Upload to Facebook Did you hear about the big Lego sale?
People were lined up for blocks! -
![Why do programmers prefer the dark?<br/>
Because the light attracts bugs!]()
Upload to Facebook Why do programmers prefer the dark?
Because the light attracts bugs! -
![The police just pulled me over and said, `Papers?`<br/>
I said, `Scissors, I win!` and drove off.<br/>
I think he wants a rematch - he's been chasing me for 45 minutes!]()
Upload to Facebook The police just pulled me over and said, "Papers?"
I said, "Scissors, I win!" and drove off.
I think he wants a rematch - he's been chasing me for 45 minutes! -
![It's been months since I bought the book, `How to scam people online.`<br/>
It still hasn't arrived yet!]()
Upload to Facebook It's been months since I bought the book, "How to scam people online."
It still hasn't arrived yet! -
![I met my wife on Tinder.<br/>
That was awkward. Her profile says, `Single`!]()
Upload to Facebook I met my wife on Tinder.
That was awkward. Her profile says, "Single"! -
![Afghanistan has banned Chess, calling it a dangerous game. Reasons are:<br/>
1. Queen doesn't wear a burkha.<br/>
2. Queen roams freely wherever she wants to.<br/>
3. Queen is more powerful than the King.<br/>
4. Queen goes alone to opponent's territory.<br/>
5. And... most importantly, there's only ONE Queen!]()
Upload to Facebook Afghanistan has banned Chess, calling it a dangerous game. Reasons are:
1. Queen doesn't wear a burkha.
2. Queen roams freely wherever she wants to.
3. Queen is more powerful than the King.
4. Queen goes alone to opponent's territory.
5. And... most importantly, there's only ONE Queen! -
![Doctor, doctor... All five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up!<br/>
Doctor: Sounds like a really bad case of parking sons disease!]()
Upload to Facebook Doctor, doctor... All five of my boys want to be valets when they grow up!
Doctor: Sounds like a really bad case of parking sons disease!
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