Funny SMS

  • Adulting is knowing it's never too late to correct yourself!Upload to Facebook
    Adulting is knowing it's never too late to correct yourself!
  • If the present situation continues, 'Car' may be added to the immovable property list!Upload to Facebook
    If the present situation continues, 'Car' may be added to the immovable property list!
  • Just heard about a dwarf who was pickpocketed.<br/>
How could anyone stoop so low?Upload to Facebook
    Just heard about a dwarf who was pickpocketed.
    How could anyone stoop so low?
  • The first 40 years of life are always the hardest!Upload to Facebook
    The first 40 years of life are always the hardest!
  • Now that I have lived through an actual plague, I totally understand why Italian Renaissance paintings are full of naked fat people laying on couches!Upload to Facebook
    Now that I have lived through an actual plague, I totally understand why Italian Renaissance paintings are full of naked fat people laying on couches!
  • I am suspicious of people who don't like dogs.<br/>
But I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person!Upload to Facebook
    I am suspicious of people who don't like dogs.
    But I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person!
  • I've got a condition that causes me to make terrible puns.<br/>
It's a dad-ly disease!Upload to Facebook
    I've got a condition that causes me to make terrible puns.
    It's a dad-ly disease!
  • The 20s - Invite everyone! The more the merrier.<br/>
The 50s - Do we have to have a party? I hate everyone!Upload to Facebook
    The 20s - Invite everyone! The more the merrier.
    The 50s - Do we have to have a party? I hate everyone!
  • Ancient Egyptian architect: `Do you know how to build a pyramid?`<br/>
Ancient Egyptian builder: `Well, err yeah, up to a point!`Upload to Facebook
    Ancient Egyptian architect: "Do you know how to build a pyramid?"
    Ancient Egyptian builder: "Well, err yeah, up to a point!"
  • I hope my kids know I don't really mean all the things this pandemic has forced me to say!Upload to Facebook
    I hope my kids know I don't really mean all the things this pandemic has forced me to say!
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