| Saw an old man dancing in the street. I think he finally cleared his CA exam! |
| I do not trip over things... . . . . . . I just perform random gravity checks! |
| Adulting is knowing it's never too late to correct yourself! |
| If the present situation continues, 'Car' may be added to the immovable property list! |
| Just heard about a dwarf who was pickpocketed. How could anyone stoop so low? |
| The first 40 years of life are always the hardest! |
| Now that I have lived through an actual plague, I totally understand why Italian Renaissance paintings are full of naked fat people laying on couches! |
| I am suspicious of people who don't like dogs. But I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person! |
| I've got a condition that causes me to make terrible puns. It's a dad-ly disease! |
| The 20s - Invite everyone! The more the merrier. The 50s - Do we have to have a party? I hate everyone! |
