Banta: Tell me a joke in which I'm not involved?
Preeto: I'm pregnant!
Preeto: You and your husband don't seem to have an awful lot in common. Why on earth did you get married?
Jeeto: I suppose it was the old business of opposites attract. He wasn't pregnant and I was.
Preeto: My hubby is like cement.
Jeeto: How?
Preeto: It takes him two days to get hard!
Preeto: I've got to get to the doctor and renew my prescription of birth control pills. I can't afford to get pregnant!
Jeeto: But I thought you said your husband, Banta, had a vasectomy!
Preeto: He did. That's why I can't afford to get pregnant.
Jeeto: I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this earsplitting yell.
Doctor: My dear, that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is!
Jeeto: The problem is that it wakes me up!
"Do you have any batteries?" Preeto asks the hardware store clerk. "Yes, m'am." The clerk gestures with his finger, "Can you come this way?" "If I could come that way," Preeto says, "I wouldn't need the batteries."