| Humor is the sublime wisdom of pity and tolerance in which man recognizes the utter futility of his own enterprise and importance. |
| My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world. |
| You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it. |
| Life would be tragic if it weren't funny. |
| There is so much stupidity in the world that, at times, one despairs that the only thing worth taking seriously are jokes. |
| Your sense of humor is one of the most powerful tools you have to make certain that your daily mood and emotional state support good health. |
| I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. |
| Nothing is more curious than the almost savage hostility that humor excites in those who lack it. |
| If you wish to make an apple pie truly from scratch, you must first invent the universe. |
| To ensure perfect aim, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. |
