A man who thinks marriage is a 50-50 proposition, does not understand either a woman or the percentage!
Self made men have one common problem: they worship their maker.
I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought: What good would that do?
Give me the luxuries of life and I will willingly do without the necessities.
Familiarity breeds.
I had nothing against women till I married one, now I have nothing!
Hermits unite!
Isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light.
Fight back! Fill out your tax forms in Roman numerals.