Death is a once in a lifetime experience.
Life is like a box of chocolates. It's full of nuts.
May your life be like toilet paper... Long and useful.
Happiness is just an illusion caused by the temporary absence of reality.
Life can only be understood backwards but it must be lived forwards.
By the time a man realizes that his father was usually right, he has a son who thinks he's usually wrong.
Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes instead of old ones.
The problem with reality is a lack of background music.
I've always wanted to be somebody, but now I see I should have been more specific.
Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat, word for word, what you shouldn't have said.
