After only a year in Canada, a Polish man got married to a nice Canadian girl. They got along quite well until the day he rushed into his lawyer's office and begged him to arrange a quick divorce.
The lawyer said, "What are the circumstances? Have you any grounds?"
And the Polish immigrant replied, "Ja, ja, ve've got an acre and a half with a nice little house."
"No, I mean, what is the foundation of your case?"
"It's made of concrete."
"Does either of you have a grudge?"
"No, but we have a big carport."
"I mean, what are your relations like?"
"All my relations are in Poland."
"Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
"Yes, we have high fidelity stereo and a CD player."
"No, I mean, does your wife beat you up?"
"No, I get up before her.` `Is your wife a nagger?"
"What? No, she's white."
`Why do you want this divorce anyway?"
"She's gonna kill me. She's going to poison me."
"Really? What makes you think so?"
`I've got proof."
"What kind of proof?"
"She brought home a bottle from the drug store that says, 'Polish Remover!'"