Clean Jokes

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman`s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn`t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered...

There was a father who called his 5 small children together. As they sat together in a circle on the floor the dad placed a toy in the middle. He explained to them that he won this toy as a door prize and he wanted to...

A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a new truck. She wanted a fast little...

At a dinner party the other night my wife tried to embarrass me by telling our guests about an argument that`s been ongoing in our house hold.
"Yes," she said smugly. "He`s well trained, I have constantly reminded him to put the seat down...

A very elderly couple is having an elegant dinner to celebrate their 75th wedding anniversary. The old man leans forward and says softly to his wife, "Dear, there is something that I must ask you. It has always...

Scene: A husband and wife watching an a Cricket match. After 5 minutes:
Wife: Is this Imran Tahir ??
Husband: No, this is Hashim Amla, Imran Tahir is a bowler.
Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket...

Wife to husband: Darling in pictures of Shiva-Parvati, Shiva has a Trishool. In pictures of Vishnu-Lakshmi, Vishnu has Chakra in hand and pictures of Rama-Sita, Rama has bow in hand. But in case of....

We were dressed and ready to go out for a party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned the local cab company and requested...

Interview of a married man for the benefit of the unmarried ones.
Reporter: So how is your married life?
Mr. Husband: First of all, "married life" is an oxymoron...

When Joe, a nice man married for over 50 years died, his wife, Myrtle was devastated. A couple of months later, Myrtle also died. Once in heaven, Myrtle anxiously looked for Joe. Suddenly, behind a cloud...