Mature Jokes

Boobs are most wonderful Multi-Purpose creation of nature.
You can suck them as a mouth freshener.
By putting the face in between the two you can relax yourselves...

A young man walks into a singles bar with a roll of fifty cents taped inside the crotch of his jeans. He looks around, then sits next to the most attractive woman there. He was very pleased with himself after he...

An old soldier sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old combat jacket and boots and ordered a cup of a coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the soldier and asked...

An old Italian couple is walking around in the mall. After a while they get separated so the woman goes up to the first sales-woman she sees and asks: Escusa me, have you seen-a my-a Tony. He`s got a big-a belly and...

A couple had been divorced for about 6 months, but still remained good friends. This worked out pretty good since the both lived in the same apartment building. One day he slipped on the ice and...

Tarzan leaves the jungle, comes to civilization, and applies for a job.

Interviewer: Name?
Tarzan: Me Tarzan.
Interviewer: Married?
Tarzan: Yes...

1. Expensive Pussy: Most pussy falls into this definition. Expensive pussy can be recognized by the following - fur coats, $500 dresses, spandex, bright colored shorts, and shirts with greek letters on them. 98% of the pussy....

I spent $5,000 on a boob job for the wife. She was delighted. I spent another $2,000 on a nose job for her. She was ecstatic. I spent $2,000 on liposuction for her and she couldn`t thank me enough! But I spend 50 bucks on...

Girlfriend: Yaar Mere Dad Bhi Na, Kitna Sunate Hain... Jab Dekho Kuch Na Kuch Sunate Hee Rehte Hain...
Pappu: hmmmmmn...
Girlfriend: Kya hmmmm..?

A medical professor was lecturing about self-examination of the breast and testicles. A female student asked a male student, "Do you ever get an erection when you do a self-examination of your testicles....