Patient: Doctor, when do you think COVID-19 will be over?
Doctor: I don't know, I am not much into politics!
Doctor: You are hot.
Girl: Oh, thank you!
Doctor: Pagal Aurat Bukhar Hai Tujhe... Heroine Mat Ban!
Difficulty is, we are facing a Chinese Virus which may not give symptoms, and we are testing with Chinese Kits that may not give results!
I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation...
So he offered to touch-up my X-rays!
Doctor: Good news! You are going to see your wife again.
Patient: But she has been dead for 5 years.
Doctor: Exactly!
It's always in a doctor's best interest to keep his patients alive. It's more profitable that way!
One good thing about Veterinary Doctors is their patients...
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can't Google!
Patient: Doctor, what happens after we die?
Doctor: We clean the bed and admit a new patient!
Doctor: It looks like you are pregnant.
Girl: I'm pregnant?
Doctor: No, but it looks like you are!
A man woke up in hospital after an accident.
He shouted, "Doctor, I can't feel my legs!"
The Doctor replied, "I know you can't, because I've cut off your arms!"