People are usually shocked when they find out I'm not a very good electrician.
Foreigner: Is it always this hot in India?
Indian: No, no… sometimes it rains and gets humid too!
Foreigner: Uses sunscreen to avoid tan.
Indian: Uses Fair & Lovely to remove tan!
Exams are like girlfriends...
Too many questions, very confusing, and the result is always disappointing!
I hadn't talked to my kids for a few days, so I changed the Netflix and Amazon passwords.
I heard from all of them within 20 minutes!
Not to brag about my finances or anything, but...
My credit card company calls me almost everyday to tell me that my balance is outstanding!
My office chair is like my best friend:
Always supporting me even when I do nothing!
At a job interview I was asked to describe myself in one word.
I said: Laxative because I make shit happen.
What do you call a tea that tastes sometimes like tea and sometimes like coffee ?
Uncertainty!!!
My ex-girlfriend just called me to say she wants us to get back together again.
Man am I a lucky guy ? I mean, first I win the lottery and now this. !!