Pappu: You know what? My dog know Maths calculations.
Bunty: Strange.
Pappu: Quite strange. I asked him, "What's four minus four?" and he said nothing!
Bunty: Why do our elders keep asking us as to what we want to become when we grow up.
Pappu: Because they are looking for ideas!
Santa: And what will you do when you grow up to be as big as me?
Pappu: Diet!
Bunty: When do you know that you're in love ?
Pappu: When you start searching for the cheapest mobile plan!
Maths Teacher: What is a line?
Pappu: A line is a dot that's going for a walk.
Teacher: Then what are parallel lines?
Pappu: A dot going for a walk with his girlfriend!
Teacher: How do you tell a male rhino from a female rhino?
Pappu: The male's the one with the remote!
To impress his girlfriend, Pappu took her to a very nice Italian restaurant. He picked up menu and ordered
Benigno Bergamini
Waiter: Sorry sir! That's the owner's name!
Bunty: Why did our class teacher come to your house last night. Something to complain or what?
Pappu: Actually, I've been suffering from insomnia so my parents requested the teacher to come and teach me something and I can fall asleep!
Pappu dropped his iPhone 5 in toilet and started crying. Suddenly, the toilet goddess came and offered him a golden iPhone 5.
Pappu tried to be modest and said, "I need my own iPhone 5 not the gold one".
The goddess replied, "Stupid, it's the same. Just clean it"!
Pappu to his girlfriend before taking off to a drive-in-movie,
"Let's hope it's something we've seen"!