When you count... it's push-ups!
When you don't... it's sex!
A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad.
An optimist is a man who hopes they are!
A frustrated MBA fresher's Facebook update:
After so many interviews, I've realized that prostitution is the only industry, that treats freshers like angels!
Girl: What shall I wear tonight?
Boy: Just close your eyes and tell me what did you see?
Girl: Nothing.
Boy: Exactly!
The best thing about dating Dracula?
The non-stop oral every month for a whole week!
America and North Korea both have a Nuclear button, but since it's men trying to find it, we're probably safe!
What kind of bees make milk?
Boobees!
Girlfriend: Do these pants make my ass look fat?
Boyfriend: No... but they make your camel toe look like a club foot!
Employee: Sir, Iss Saal Salary Kitni Badha Rahe Ho?
Boss: ➰ 〰
Employee: Yeh Kya Hai Sir?
Boss: Jhaant Barabar!
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the arse of anyone who fucks up your new year and may their arms be too smart to scratch it.
All the best for 2018!
