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Nothing in my life ever works out, so why should I?

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If I ever had to run for my life, I would probably definitely die!

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I'm not fat, my stomach is 3D!

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To all the healthy eaters and dieters:
It doesn't matter what you eat between Christmas & New Year.
It's what you eat between New Year & Christmas that counts.
Enjoy the holiday season!

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My favorite sport is running to the door to get pizza delivery!

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I try to avoid things that make me fat, like scales, mirrors and photographs!

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I wish everything was as easy as getting fat!

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I'm not like other girls... I know what I want for dinner. I've been thinking about it since we finished lunch!

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Nothing in my life ever works out, so why should I?

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If I overcook all my food, will I lose weight since I already burnt the calories?