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~ AnonymousWhen a guy goes to a hooker, he's not paying her for sex, he's paying her to leave. -
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~ AnonymousYou are alive... when tomorrow's hope means more to you than yesterday's mistake. -
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~ AnonymousTo improve your memory, lend people money. -
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~ AnonymousA Xylophone is an instrument used mainly to illustrate the letter X. -
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~ AnonymousThe ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't get angry, doesn't exist. -
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~ AnonymousSmile today, tomorrow could be worse. -
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~ AnonymousFacebook is the adult way of having imaginary friends. -
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~ AnonymousThe difference between men and boys is the price of their toys. -
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~ AnonymousSex on television can't hurt you unless you fall off. -
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~ AnonymousTroubles are a lot like people, they grow bigger if you nurse them.