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Before marriage: Time stands still when I'm with you.
After marriage: My relationship with you isn't going anywhere! -
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My wife completely ignores me when she watches Netflix. So I renewed my subscription for another 10 years! -
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The Health Ministry is looking to hire couples married for 10 years or more to educate people on social distancing! -
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In a British bar, a short discussion on arranged marriage took place as follows:
English Man: How could you marry a woman before knowing her?
Indian Man: How could you marry a woman after knowing her?
End of the discussion! -
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Once upon a time, I used to find Board Exams difficult, now the Board finds it difficult to hold Exams! -
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As soon as I got fully motivated to join the gym, Government shuts it down again! -
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Before marriage:
Husband: I love your curves.
Wife: You naughty boy.
After marriage:
Husband: I love your curves.
Wife: Are you calling me fat? -
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My wife said I'd gotten fat since she married me.
I said "Yeah, you got 50% more of me. That's a great return on investment!" -
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Life doesn't just throw the things to you that you desire most. You have to earn them with every bit of your blood and sweat! -
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Doctor, filling medical report: You have a broken hand, severe concussion and bruised eyes. Are you married?
Me: Yes, but my wife didn't do it. I fell off the bike this time!
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