Banta: OMG, you have a black eye. Who did that to you?
Santa: My wife.
Banta: I thought she was at her parents' home.
Santa: That's what I thought too!
Banta: What did you get on Christmas?
Santa: My wife went to buy a Christmas present for me but then she saw a beautiful purse. So she bought a pair of shoes for her!
Jeeto: You tell a man something, it goes into one ear and comes out of the other.
Santa: You tell a woman something, it goes into both ears and comes out of the mouth!
While in this farmers' protest Santa was cornered by the media.
Media: What are you protesting for?
Santa: The govt should remove the three laws and keep only one law.
Media: You mean remove the recent 3 farm laws?
Santa: No. the Mother-in-law, the Father-in-law and the Brother-in-law.
Media: And which law should be kept?
Santa: Only Sister-in-law!
Jeeto: What is your New Year's resolution?
Santa: I don't know. You haven't told me!
Santa: My wife and I share the same passion.
Banta: How?
Santa: I want to travel and she wants me to go away!
Doctor: Do you have a problem with alcohol?
Santa: No, I have a problem without alcohol!
Jeeto: Would you care to explain why the bottle of whisky you bought yesterday is half empty?
Santa: It's because you're a pessimist!
Santa: You know? My uncle is now resting in peace.
Banta: I had no clue your uncle died.
Santa: No, the one who died was my aunt!
Jeeto: Honey, the car is getting hot. What should I do?
Santa: Tell the car you have a headache!