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Pro Tip:
You can know all the things wrong about you from your wife by simply forgetting her birthday!

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Various researchers and studies found that if women sleep long hours, it reduces brain strokes, blood pressure, diabetes and heart attacks in men!

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ਸਲੋਕ ਮ: ੧ ॥
ਬਲਿਹਾਰੀ ਗੁਰ ਆਪਣੇ ਦਿਉਹਾੜੀ ਸਦ ਵਾਰ॥
ਜਿਨਿ ਮਾਣਸ ਤੇ ਦੇਵਤੇ ਕੀਏ ਕਰਤ ਨ ਲਾਗੀ ਵਾਰ ॥੧॥

A hundred times a day, I am a sacrifice to my Guru;
He made angels out of men, without delay.
Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji - Ang 462

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Woman 1: You said you wouldn't marry anyone. Men are animals. Still, you agreed to marry a guy!
Woman 2: It is not a bad idea to pet an animal!

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Wife: Ugh I gained 3 lbs during vacation. What about you?
Me (looking at scale showing I actually lost a pound): I gained 4!

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People are in our life for a reason, season or lifetime.
The pain comes when we put them in the wrong category!

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Carpets are dangerous. My wife tripped over it and I ended up sleeping on the sofa.
Okay, I laughed when she fell, but still!

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Me, 10 years ago: I can eat whatever I want.
Me 5, years ago: I can eat 3 slices of pizza, I'm watching my weight.
Me, now: I walked past Pizza Hut and gained 5 Kg!

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For our anniversary dinner, my wife gave me the freedom to choose whichever restaurant she wants me to choose!

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Wife: You need to exercise more often.
Me showing fitness app on phone: See, I did 5,200 steps last night.
Wife: True, but those steps were around the dinner buffet!