For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
I`m writing an unauthorized autobiography.
If at first you don`t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
I like to paint passing lines on curved roads.
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
I replaced the headlights on my car with strobe lights. Now it looks like I'm the only one moving.
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot.
I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.
I have a full-size map of the world. At the bottom it says `1 inch = 1 inch`. I hardly ever unroll it.