Affair With The Secretary
So the boss gets a hot new secretary, and almost immediately they start having an affair.
However, within a few weeks, he is feeling displeased at the way she is performing at work, coming to work late, ignoring phone calls, and so on.
Finally, he pulls her aside and says, "Listen, baby, we may have gone to bed together a few times, but who said you could start coming in late and slacking off?"
And the secretary says, "My lawyer."
Why Men Prefer To Watch Football In Pubs or Cafes
Wife: Where are you going?
Husband: Watch the game at the pub.
Wife: Why don't you watch it with me?
Husband: I want to watch it with my friends.
Wife: So I mean nothing to you?
Husband: OK, OK. I am staying...
The Wife Has It All Sorted
A husband and wife are sitting on the couch when the husband looks over and says, "Honey, if I died, would you get remarried?"
The wife thinks about it and says, "Well, we have a beautiful house, and I don't want to be alone, so...
Going Up, Letting Down
I took an elevator up to the 69th floor for a meeting and as I was getting out, the operator said, "Have a good day, son."
I grumbled, "Don't call me son. You're not my dad."
He scratched his head...
First Day With The Hook
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."
"What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine...
Expensive Persian Rugs
A sophisticated, well-dressed woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs. She looks around, spots a beautiful rug, and walks over to inspect it...