An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for Viagra.
The pharmacist said, "That's no problem. How many do you want?"
The old gentleman answered, "Just a few, maybe 4, but please cut each one into 4 pieces."
The pharmacist said, "That won't do you any good."
The elderly gentleman said, "That's all right. I don't need them for sex anymore, as I am over 80 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes."