Men Will Never Learn
A woman ran a red traffic light and crashed into a man`s car. Both of their cars are demolished, but amazingly neither of them was hurt. After they crawled out of their cars, the woman said, "Wow, just look at our cars...
Equal Privileges
A country club didn`t allow women on the golf course. Eventually, there was enough pressure that they decided to allow women on the course during the week. The ladies were satisfied with this arrangement, formed a women`s club...
Women Can't Keep Secrets
At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy.
"No woman," said one man, scornfully, "can keep a secret."
"I don`t know about that...
Time Zones are Confusing
One of Russia`s Ambassadors was having dinner with Putin and said that time zones around the world confused him. "Why?" Putin asks.
"Ah, Mr. President, I called Angela Merkel to congratulate...
The Picture Diet
I remember one time when I was home visiting my folks. My mom asked me to set the table for dinner. I opened the refrigerator and taped to the inside of the door was a risque picture of a lovely, slender...
Blonde Witness
A blonde was summoned to court to appear as a witness in a lawsuit. The prosecutor opened his questioning with, "Where were you the night of August 24th?"
"Objection!" said the defense attorney...
Wonderful Spouse
Congratulating a friend after her son and daughter got married within a month of each other, a woman asked, "What kind of boy did your daughter marry?"
"Oh, he`s wonderful," gushed the mother. "He lets her..
Show Business
A man is hired by the circus to perform a necessary but rather unpleasant task. He is asked to walk behind the elephants in the center ring, shoveling aside their droppings as they walk about. After a rather...
Common Sense is Dead
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic...
Superfast Turtle
A guy comes walking into a bar with a turtle in his hand. The turtle`s one eye is black and blue, two of his legs are bandaged, and his whole shell is taped together with duct tape....