Clean Jokes

There were three men at a bar. One man got drunk and started a fight with the other two men. The police came and took him...

Late one Friday night the policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening.
'It's Friday, you know...

One day a drunk walked into a bar and ordered a gin and tonic. He drank half of it and poured the rest on the bartender.
The bartender got angry, grabbed the drunk by the collar, pulled him close to his face, and asked...

It was many years ago since the embarrassing day when a young woman, with a baby in her arms, entered his butcher shop and confronted him with the news that the baby was his and asked what was he going to do about it?
Finally he offered to provide her with free...

Joe spent the evening tossing down a number of beers at the local bar. It was after eleven o'clock when he finally staggered out into the cold and rainy night in an attempt to find...

A man walked into the bar and saw an old friend of his, drinking by himself. Approaching his friend, he commented, 'You look awful. What's wrong?'
'My mother died in May and left me 25,00,000,' the friend answered.
'Boy, that's tough,' the man replied.
Continuing, the friend said, 'Then in...

A man with no arms walked up to a bar and asked for a beer.
The bartender shoved the foaming glass in front of him. 'Look,' said the customer, 'I have no arms - would you please hold the glass up to my mouth?'
'Sure', said the bartender, and he did.
'Now,' said the customer, 'I...

This guy who stutters badly, walks into a Bar, and says: 'Ssay! Bbbartender, gggimme a bbbeer'.
The Bartender, who is badly Humpbacked, serves him a beer and says, 'That will be Rs 200 please!'
The Guy thinks that's pretty high priced and says...

A pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digested, then suddenly a whiskey came along.
Pizza thought: 'Ok. I'll let him pass, there's no hurry.'
Two minutes later another whiskey comes by and pizza let him pass too, but two minutes later when the next one got there...

A guy walks into a bar with his girlfriend.
A very drunk man in the bar looks at the girl and says loudly, 'If you were my woman, I would lick you from top to bottom like a lollipop.'
The boyfriend is angered and starts to get up to kick the drunken guy's ass. The girlfriend stops him, telling him...