Clean Jokes

Margie received a bill from the hospital for her recent surgery, and was astonished to see a $1200 fee for the anesthesiologist. She called his office to demand an explanation. "Is this some kind of...

I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well for my age".
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn`t resist asking him...

Lady patient to the Doctor inside his examination room: Doctor can you please call my husband inside, I am not feeling comfortable.
Doctor: Trust me lady, I am...

Yesterday I was talking to my doctor and after knowing my occupation he advised: You must exercise more. Don`t buy cold drinks from stalls. Drink more plain water. Don`t drive when going out...

A woman needed to visit the doctor`s office just to have her throat swabbed for a culture. She sat in the waiting room for quite some time with her legs crossed, reading a magazine while other...

Morris realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. "How much do they cost?" he asked the salesperson.
"That depends," he said. "They run from...

On a busy Med/Surg floor the doctor stops the nurse to brief her on a patient`s condition, "This patient is a fellow physician and my favorite golf partner. His injury is serious and I fear he will not be able to...

The Indian Medical Association has weighed the demonetization high value notes and this is what they have to say: The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves...

A dentist, doing his first extraction on a patient, was understandably nervous. When he got the molar out, his hand shook, he lost his grip on the instrument, and the tooth dropped down into the patient`s throat...

An old man visits his doctor and after thorough examination the doctor tells him: "I have good news and bad news, what would you like to hear first?"
Patient: Well, give me the bad news first...