Who`s smarter?
A North Carolina man, having bought several expensive cigars, insured them against theft, loss, and fire.
After he had smoked them, he then decided that he had a claim against the insurance company...
The cost of a heart!
Doctor tells a rich old man that he`s going to die if he doesn`t get a new heart soon. The old man tells the doctor to search the world for the best heart available, money is no problem.
A few days later the doctor calls...
And the truth dawns!
A judge was instructing the jury that a witness was not necessarily to be regarded as untruthful because he changed his statement after he gave it to the police.
'For example.' he said, 'when I entered my chambers today, I was positive that I had my gold watch...
The law of equality!
Said a lady to her friend, 'When we got our divorce we divided everything we had equally between us. Two children stayed with me, two went to my ex-husband.'
'What happened to the...
An honest lawyer?
A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl`s grandmother.
On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, 'Mommy, do they ever bury...
The Lawyer and St. Peter… incongruous ?
The lawyer is standing at the gate to Heaven and St. Peter is listing his sins: 1) Defending a large corporation in a pollution suit where he knew they were guilty, 2) Defending an obviously guilty murderer because...
Fire and floods...
A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean.
The lawyer said, 'I`m here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for...
Contribution!
An attorney was asked to make a contribution to a worthwhile charity.
His response was, 'I guess you hadn`t heard, my mother is suffering from a terminal illness and she has medical bills which far exceed...
Stupid instructions!
In Oregon, dead people are forbidden to serve on juries!
And, actual packaging instructions:
ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: Product will be hot after heating.
ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: Do not iron...
The Catch
An attorney was sitting in his office late one night, when the Devil appeared before him.
The Devil told the lawyer, 'I have a proposition for you.You can win every case you try, for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange