Clean Jokes

A priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician, who was also a member of the congregation, was chosen to...

There once was a husband and wife who were unable to have children. After consulting everyone who would listen to their problem, they were still unsatisfied. Finally...

A pastor at a frontier church ended a stirring sermon with, "All those who want to go to heaven, put up your hands!"
Everybody enthusiastically raised their hands....

A farmer purchased an old, run-down; abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields were grown over with weeds, the farmhouse was falling apart, and...

The poor country pastor was livid when he confronted his wife with the receipt for a $250 dress she had bought.
"How could you do this!" he exclaimed.
"I don't know...

Late one night a preacher was making his weary way home. As he traveled the hilly, curving country road, he overtook a car. The slow moving car was weaving from one side of the road to the other in...

A man was brought to Mercy Hospital and taken in for coronary surgery. The operation went well and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of...

Three little boys were looking for a summer job. Their preacher needed some people to go around and sell Bibles, so the preacher hired two boys without even thinking...

Two old Jewish men are strolling down the street one-day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign posted that says, 'Convert to Catholicism and get $50.'
One of the Jewish men stops walking and...

John and Mike are walking from religious service. John wonders whether it would be all right to smoke while praying. Mike replies, 'Why don't you ask the...