Clean Jokes

The new preacher had just begun his sermon. He was a little nervous, and about ten minutes into the sermon his mind went blank. After a brief second of complete panic, he remembered...

At a church meeting, a very wealthy man rose to tell the rest of those present about his Christian faith. "I`m a millionaire," he said, "and I attribute it all to the rich blessings of God in my life...

Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, "Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?"
"I think so," the man replied...

A man was walking in the mountains just enjoying the scenery when he stepped too close to the edge of the mountain and started to fall. In desperation he reached out and grabbed a limb of a gnarly old tree hanging...

There was an old Priest who got sick of all the people in his Parish who kept confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I`ll quit...

A Preacher said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I`d take it and throw it into the river."
And the congregation cried, "Amen!"
"And if I had all the wine in the world, I`d take it and throw it...

A nun walks into a liquor store and asks for a bottle of whisky. The owner is shocked, "I`m sorry, Sister, but I`m a good church-going man. I simply can`t sell liquor to a nun."
The nun blushes a little...

The lady was embarrassed and apologetic to the priest after church service was over, "Reverend, I hope you didn`t take it personally, when my husband bluntly walked out of the room during your sermon...

I went to a Inter-Religion Integration Seminar. The Bishop came, laid his hands on my hand and said, "By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!"
I smiled and told him I was not paralysed. The Rabbi came...

Sister Marry was truly a religious woman. Besides for her duties as a nun, she was also very active in various hospitals visiting sick patients and taking care of all their needs. So it was no surprise that one day...