Santa on duty
A new soldier, Banta, was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were clear: No car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the windshield.
A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back.
Banta said, 'Halt, who goes there?'
The sergeant, who was driving, motioned to the back seat and...
Santa in America
Santa and his son were visiting America for the very first time.
Santa was at a Local Food store going up & down the aisles with his son.
Santa asked, 'What is this??
Santa`s son, 'Powdered orange juice'
Santa, 'Powdered orange juice??'Son: 'Yeah, Dad. You just...
One kiss per...
Walking up to a department store`s fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, 'I want to buy this material for a new dress. How much does it cost?'
'Only one kiss per meter madam,' replied Banta (clerk).
'That`s fine,' replied the girl. 'I`ll take...
Hijack!!
Santa arrived in his village from Amritsar in a very sombre mood. His clothes were torn and the geography his body was like a picturesque place affected by earthquake, which had uprooted almost evrything.
When his dear friend Banta saw this state of Santa. He was in a state of shock. Banta enquired from Santa, the reason of this bad state.
Santa informed Banta that...
Anniversary Night
On their anniversary night, Santa and his wife sat down in the den with her favourite magazine, turned on the soft reading lamp, slipped off her shoes, patted and propped her feet and announced that he was preparing dinner all by himself.
'How romantic!' Jeeto thought.
Two-and-a-half hours later, Jeeto was still waiting for dinner to be served.
She tiptoed to the kitchen and found...
Escape
Banta was in jail serving 30 years for robbing banks. After serving about 12 years he is notified that his Uncle from Ludhiana has died and left him over 50 lacs. Banta was so happy when the warden said he would put it in trust untll he was released.
The warden asked him if there was anything he wanted to buy before tying the money up. Banta said ...
The Tramp
Banta was walking home late one night when he came upon this intoxicated tramp on the sidewalk. Wanting to help, he asked the man, 'Do you live here?'
'Yesh,' the man slowly replied.
'Would you like me to help you upstairs?' Banta asked.
'Yesh,' the man slowly sputtered.
War Veterans
Santa mistakenly gets on a bus full of war veterans, but upon discovering it is going his way, decides to stay on for the ride.
He sits down next to a guy that jerks his head to the left every few seconds, over and over.
This really bothers Santa so he asks him, 'What's wrong with you?'
The reply is, 'I got this in the war.'
Constipation!!
Banta, a construction worker goes to the doctor and says, 'Doc, I`m constipated.'
The doctor examines him for a minute and then says, 'Lean over the table.'
Banta leans over the table, the doctor whacks him on the ass with a bat, CRACK, CRACK, CRACK... and then...
Happy Birthday!
Santa walks into a bar in Ludhiana and asks for three beers. The bartender puts them up and then watches Santa go through a peculiar ritual.
'Happy Birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday' Each time he says the word he drinks the beer. Then he pays and walks out.
One year later he enters the same bar again and orders the same thing. The bartender...