Santa: My friend lost all his money.
Banta: Played with stocks?
Santa: No. Played with girls!
Banta: What is your chief worry in life?
Santa: Money.
Banta: Oh! I don't think you have any.
Santa: Yes. That's the worry!
Santa: My wife believes in the adage - there are two sides to every question.
Banta: Hmmm... I am listening.
Santa: They are - her side and the wrong side!
Santa and Banta were on a holiday. While on a hillock, Santa to Banta, "Are you coming up?"
Banta: What's up there?
Santa: The view.
Banta: The view of what? The view of down here? I can see that down here.
Santa: You are about the worst tourist in the whole world!
Santa and Banta go to a cinema to watch a movie.
Ticket Clerk: Yes sir?
Santa: Can I have two tickets please?
Ticket Clerk: For "Ek Villain"? Santa: No, for 2 comedians, Santa and Banta!
After reading the form filled by Santa, the Interviewr said: We do have an opening for you.
Santa: What is it?
Interviewer: It's not what, it's where... and it's called DOOR!
Santa to the shopkeeper: Give me one litre Wheat Flour.
Shopkeeper: Wheat flour is not sold in litre. Ask for it again.
Santa: Ok. Please give me one KG Wheat Flour in this bottle.
Shopkeeper: You don't ask like this? Ok. You pose as a shopkeeper and let me buy wheat flour from you.
Santa: OK!
Shopkeeper: Give me one KG Wheat Flour.
Santa: Have you brought the bottle?
Banta: Why doesn't China play Cricket?
Santa: Actually, ICC doesn't want them to play the game because everyone looks the same. If someone gets out, he shall go to the pavilion, wash his face and come out to bat again!
Jeeto irritatingly to inebriated Santa: You're never going to mend your ways. Today again, you have come home drunk.
Santa: I swear to drunk, I'm not God!
Santa goes to a chinese restaurant and puts his finger on the last of menu, bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can't get it because he is the owner of the restaurant!