Santa: I am unable to sleep.
Doctor: Try a cosy bed, a dim light and light music.
Santa: How is this all possible in office?
Santa: There are 2 periods in a man's life when he doesn't understand women.
Jeeto: Indeed, and when are these periods?
Santa: Before marriage and after marriage!
Santa to his friend's son, "Where have you been for the last 4 years?
"At college, taking medicine."
Santa: And did you finally get well?
Santa while taking a head-bath was applying shampoo even on his shoulders.
Jeeto: Why are you applying shampoo on shoulders?
Santa: This shampoo is special. It is clearly written on it "Head and Shoulders"!
Banta: Why didn't you give the secretary's job to that girl who came for interview?
Santa: She seemed to be very stupid girl.
Banta: How did you infer that she's stupid?
Santa: When I asked her to sit, she started looking for a chair!
Santa: O!!! So you want to become a farmer? You'll need sheep, chickens... herd of cows?
Banta: Of course, I've heard of cows!
Santa: What's the matter, today you're getting a lot of "I love you" messages.
Banta: Bhaji, I am not that lucky. Today I brought my wife's mobile!
Santa: If something happens to me during the operation, please marry the doctor who operates upon me.
Jeeto: Why re you saying such a thing? And why only the same doctor?
Santa: Why should the doctor be let off?
Banta: Why did you go upstairs when the party is the lawns?
Santa: I overheard that the drinks are on the house!
Santa walks into a bar and approaches the barman, "Can I have a glass of Less, please?"
"I'm sorry sir", the barman replies, looking slightly puzzled, "I've not come across that one before. Is it a spirit?"
Santa: I've no idea... the thing is, I went to see my doctor last week and he told me that I should drink 'LESS'!