Marriage is nothing, but give and take.
You better give it to her or she'll take it anyway!
My marriage is built upon trust and understanding.
She doesn't trust me and I don't understand her!
I read somewhere that applying honey on anything makes it better.
I tried but my wife woke up screaming at me!
Screaming at me at the top of her voice ten times a day is how my wife gets her cardio!
When a new husband wins an argument with his wife, he celebrates because he thinks it's forever.
When an experienced husband wins an argument with his wife, he's scared because he knows that he's just temporarily postponing his ultimate defeat!
Finding a husband is hard
You find a handsome one, the brain is empty.
You find a brilliant one, he looks too serious.
You find a rich one, he is disrespectful.
You find a hardworking one, he never has time for you.
You find a serious one, his ex keeps calling.
You find a humble one, he is broke.
You find a responsible one, he is not romantic.
You find an educated one, he feels he is always right.
You find an illiterate one, he always gets angry whenever you correct him.
You find a smart one, he lies all the time!
The success of any marriage depends entirely upon the husband's ability to know when to stay silent and when to say sorry!
My wife has been having this terrible headache for the last three years.
It's still a mystery to me why it occurs only at around bedtime!
Love, of course, hurts, but not as much as marriage!
Husband: You've been correcting every word I say for the last eleven years.
Wife: Twelve years!
