Humour is the best cure for depression.
No wonder married men are really funny!
Me: I'm worried, the doctor advised me to have my brain scanned.
Wife: Don't worry honey, I'm sure they won't find anything.
I'm not sure if she was consoling me or being sarcastic!
When your wife says sorry to you, what she actually means is that you'll be sorry for it later!
My wife & I have these cute codes that only we understand.
For example, during the dinner with friends, when my wife smiles and says, "Honey, what are you doing?", it's a warning for me to stop whatever the hell I'm doing as it is irritating her!
Pro Tip for Men:
When your wife is mopping the floor, don't ask her why the lunch is late!
My wife has answers to all my questions, I don't even have to ask!
Some days I get a feeling that my wife married me only because she needed someone to carry all these shopping bags!
Long ago, I proposed to my wife by asking her to marry me and make me the happiest man in the world.
She said she cannot do both at the same time.
And I thought it was a joke!
Wife: There are rumors that there'll be a lockdown again soon. It's better you stock up some alcohol.
Husband: Awww, so you really care about me.
Wife: No it's for me, I need alcohol to survive another lockdown with you!
My wife just walked out of the store with many shopping bags without even noticing me standing here.
I think I need to write "75% off" on my T-shirt to get her attention!
