Your phone collects more data about you than any implanted microchip would!
Computers are really, really stupid. That's why programming is hard. They won't do anything unless you explicitly tell them to do it!
Dear people who are on a diet, even websites have cookies and you don't!
New Tech Guy: Our devices are now 100% secure.
Boss: How did you do that?
New Tech Guy: I turned them all off!
If anyone keeps talking into air, thinking there are 100 people around listening - we used to call it delusion and now it's called webinar!
All Samsung officials are withdrawing their children from school, as the first thing children are being taught is...
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'A for Apple'!
I am seriously thinking of deleting my social media accounts. Otherwise, I would never be left with any time to use all the knowledge and wisdom gathered from all my social media accounts!
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you.
You have my Word!