While traveling in a train.
Stranger: You're so fit.
Pappu: Thank You, Uncle Lekin Bata Deta Hun Main Upar Wali Berth Pe Nahi Sounga Meri Neeche Wali Seat Hai!
Teacher: I told you to stand at the end of the line.
Pappu: I tried, but somebody was already there!
Pappu: I need a doctor's appointment.
Receptionist: OK, how about 10 tomorrow?
Pappu: Are you crazy? I don't need that many!
Santa: Behen Ki Shaadi Hai Aur Cards Bhi Nahi Baatein Ab Tak.
Pappu: Main Baant Deta Hun, Ek Baar Shuffle Kar Ke De Do!
Pappu: My girlfriend just saved me a lot of money.
Bunty: How?
Pappu: She married someone else!
Pappu: Hi, Kya Naam Hai Tumhara?
Girl: Khushi
Pappu: Kahan Rehti Ho?
Girl: Yahi Pichhli Gali Mein Ghar Hai.
Pappu: Ghar? Par Maine Toh Suna Hai Ki Khushi Ka Koi Thikana Nahi Hota!
Teacher: What is a Barometer?
Pappu: It's the distance between Bar & National Highway measured in meters!
Bunty: I want a Tank.
Pappu: Well then, why don't you get one?
Bunty: Because it costs a lot of money. I don't have that kind of money.
Pappu: Why don't you use your credit card?
Bunty: How am I going to pay the credit card company? They'll come after me.
Pappu: Don't be silly. You have a Tank!
Bunty: How's your new girlfriend?
Pappu: She said that she wanted to walk down the aisle.
Bunty: What did you do?
Pappu: I sent her for grocery shopping!
Pappu to the shopkeeper: Printer Ka Paper Dena.
Shopkeeper: A4?
Pappu: A for Apple. Tu Paper De Na Yaar!