| When I was a kid, I had a friend who worked in a radio station. Whenever we walked under a bridge, you couldn't understand what he said. |
| Pollution is so bad that when I put air in my tyres two of them died. |
| A women drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her. |
| I doubt everything, even my own doubt. |
| A dolphin will jump out of the water for a piece of fish. Imagine what he'd do for some chips. |
| I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. |
| Egotism is the anaesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity. |
| My kid is a born doctor. Nobody can read anything he writes. |
| When I was a kid, I had two imaginary friends. They would only play with each other. |
| Stupidity is far more fascinating than intelligence, after all intelligence has it's limits. |