Clean Jokes

A woman gets cheated by her husband. Devastated, she doesn`t know how to continue to live her life. She heard that there`s a very wise monk who lives up in a mountain, and decided to go there to consult him..

A group of people were touring a university campus and they noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand.
"What are they dong?

A girl showed interest in only marrying a lawyer. I asked the girl, "Why do you prefer a lawyer to marry?"
She said, "They bow their head while entering the room and again while going out. They say...

A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie`s house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park...

Anyone who has raised, or even just been around, a toddler knows these things are true. Toddlers and drunks are EERILY similar!
No personal boundaries.
Falls over A LOT. Gets up...

A father had promised his two young sons he would take them on a fishing trip. The boys were digging for fishing bait in their parents` garden. Uncovering a many legged creature, one of the boys proudly dangled...

When a customer left his cell phone in my store, I scrolled through his saved numbers, stopped at "Mom" and pushed send. His mother answered, and I told her what happened...

A guy goes to a girl`s house for the first time, and she shows him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to get them some snacks and drinks. As he`s standing there alone...

Lady patient to the Doctor inside his examination room: Doctor can you please call my husband inside, I am not feeling comfortable.
Doctor: Trust me lady, I am...

A farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds, the farmhouse is falling apart, and the fences are collapsing...