Clean Jokes

A blonde went into a pet shop and asked the owner if he had any parrots. The owner replied, "Sorry, I don`t have any at the moment."
"Damn!" said the blonde, "I`ve been invited to a fancy masquerade party...

Pauly`s family is at dinner, the 10-year-old daughter isn`t eating much, and she just keeps her head down. After a few minutes, she says, "I have something to tell you." Everyone gets silent...

Each evening bird-lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl. One night, an owl called back to him. For a year, the man and his feathered friend hooted back and forth. He even kept a log of the conversation....

An elderly lady phoned her telephone company to report that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called... and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her pet dog always moaned...

I remember once when my dad gave me money to pay the electricity bill but instead I bought a raffle ticked for a brand new car. When I got home, I explained to my dad what I did and he beat the crap...

Once Mrs. Aggarwal was being cross examined in Court by a lawyer. Mrs. Aggarwal had said that she was a partner in her husband`s firm, but the lawyer of the opposite party was trying to prove that she was only a...

An army major called his wife to tell her that he would be late home because dirty magazines had been found in the barracks and the soldiers responsible were facing serious disciplinary...

Women are fickle minded.
At 18, they want handsome men.
At 25, they want successful men.
At 30, they want sensible men...

Have you witnessed few things suddenly getting changed in your life only in a span of 1 or 2 decades
Curds became Yogurt!
Biscuits became cookies!
Sweet became Dessert...

Before you return from your overseas trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pickup truck when I turned into the driveway. Fortunately not too bad and I really didn`t get hurt, so please...