Clean Jokes

A photographer from a news organization was assigned to cover the fires in California. His boss wanted pictures of the heroic work of the fire fighters as they battled the blaze but when the photographer arrived...

A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher for 16 - 18 year olds. She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun, kicking a football...

Patient: I have fever, headache, cough and cold. I`ve taken some basic medicines for the same. Doctor: Which ones?
Patient: Paracetamol, Amoxicillin, Levocetrizine,Theophylline,Montelukast, Bromhexine...

Three little rabbits escaped from a testing lab and found an entire field full of carrots. They ate themselves into a stupor and slept through the night. The next morning, they found an entire field full of female rabbits...

A urologist in New York had a leak in his bathroom on a Sunday. He called a plumber who charged him a $50 call out fee plus another $100 for fixing the problem in 15 minutes. The urologist was shocked and...

A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him, "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump...

Abe was well known for his cheapness and his `eye for a bargain`. One day he was looking for a cheap wedding present for his niece, so he went into a thrift shop. As he was walking around, he noticed what was previously...

A man is lost in the desert. He used up the last of his water three days ago and he`s lying, gasping, on the sand, when in the distance he suddenly hears a voice calling - `Mush! Mush!` Not trusting his ears he turns...

I was meeting a friend in a bar and as I went in, I noticed two pretty girls looking at me. "Nine," I heard one whisper as I passed.
Feeling pleased with myself, I swaggered over to my buddy and told him a girl...

A Swiss guy, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Englishmen are waiting. "Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he says. The two Englishmen...