Clean Jokes


Lie Clocks

A woman dies. In heaven she sees a large Wall full of Clocks. She asks angel: What are these for? Angel answers: These are Lie Clocks, every person has a lie clock! Whenever you lie on earth, clock moves....

Disturbance in Barroom

A police officer responded to a report of a barroom disturbance. The "disturbance" turned out to be well over six feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds. What`s more, he boasted that he could...

Yesterday I got my permit to carry a concealed weapon. So, today I went over to the local Gun shop to get a handgun for home/personal protection. When I was ready to pay for the pistol and ammo, the cashier said...

Forgiveness

The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a long sermon, he asked how many were willing to forgive their enemies. About half held up their hands. Not satisfied he...

A Funny Interview

A Mallu woman went for a job interview for the post of a Secretary. The Manager saw the woman`s colorful clothes, gold jewellery, extra coconut oiled hair, and his mind was screaming: "NOT THIS WOMAN."

French Fries

There was once a Sheep Farmer who needed help with his farm, especially, the difficult task of castrating some of his inferior male Sheep to keep them from breeding with the Females...

Brown Trousers

Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate...

Cross-Examination

In a terrible accident at a railroad crossing, a train smashed into a car and pushed it nearly four hundred yards down the track. Though no one was killed, the driver took the train company to court...

Chemistry Lectures

A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years -- chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry...

Bank Robbery

During a robbery in America, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank: "Don`t move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belongs to you."
Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called...

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