Clean Jokes


Too Many Kids

A husband and his wife advertised for a live-in maid to cook and do the housework. They hired a most comely young woman for the job. She worked out fine, was a good cook, was polite, and kept the house neat...

Time Saving Techniques

The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution: "You don`t want to try these techniques at home."
"Why not?" asked somebody from the audience.
"I watched my wife`s routine...

Drive It Safe

A man traveling down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle covering the entire road. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a farmer leaning on a fence...

Having A Real Bad Day

A lady is having a bad day at the table in Monte Carlo. Down to her last Pound 100, completely exasperated, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?"
A gentleman next to her...

Bricklayer's Accident Report

Possibly the funniest story in a long while. This is a bricklayer`s accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian equivalent of our Workers` Compensation board...

The Fart List

THE CUSHIONED FART: A concealed fart, sometimes successful. The farter is usually on the fat side, sometimes a girl. They will squirm and push their butt way down into the cushions of a sofa or over-stuffed...

Not the Same Elephant

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant...

The First Date

A guy walks into a bookstore, not looking for anything in particular. On his way to the back of the store, he spots something of interest. A book with a very interesting title, "Dating for the New Millennium...

Always Listen to Your Mom

Son: Daddy, I`ve a small doubt!
Dad: Bolo Na Beta.
Son: Daddy, I learned that Shri Ram became GOD by listening to his Dad in SATYA YUGA...

New Restroom Trip Policy

Find that your employees are slacking off at work? Not fully utilizing their office hours? Spending too much time in the restroom and toilet chats? Try this new policy that is guaranteed to return those lost hours...