Clean Jokes

A stockbroker was cold calling about a penny stock and found a taker. "I think this one will really move," said the broker. "It`s only $1 a share."
"Buy me 1,000 shares," said the client...

A lady goes into the butcher shop and as she is walking around the store, she spies a beef tongue in the butcher`s counter.
The lady asks, "What in the world is that...

Sarah and Abe are out celebrating their 20th wedding anniversary. During the evening, Sarah broaches the subject of (their) life insurance, an issue she has been raising with him for at least 10 years...

A businessman is hurrying home on the motorway after a hard days work when he is stopped by a policeman. "Do you know you were driving 30 mph over the limit?" asks the policeman.
"Eh, actually no...

The Goa Police have found a large number of dead crows on the Goa-Karnataka highway early this morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Pathologist examined the remains...

A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table...

A rabbi and a priest meet up after a year not seeing each other. The rabbi goes, "Man, you`ve put on some weight since last time!"
Priest: "Yeah I know, it is a new technique I came up with...

They`re still laughing about this at IBM. Apparently the computer giant decided to have some parts manufactured in Japan as a trial project. In the specifications, they stated that they will only accept...

There was a businessman, and he was not feeling well, so he went to see the doctor about it. The doctor says to him, "Well, it must be your diet, what sort of greens do you eat?"
The man replies, "Well, actually...

This man was sitting quietly reading his paper one morning, peacefully enjoying himself, when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the back of his head with a huge frying pan. Man: What was that...