Banta: 14th February Ko Kya Hai? Santa: Tere Paas Biwi Hai Ya Girlfriend? Banta: Biwi. Santa: To Phir Sunday Hai!
Doctor: Depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? Take this tablet, drink a lot of water, sleep well & you'll be fine in the morning. Bartender: Depressed because your girlfriend dumped you? Drink these shots, call her, tell her to buzz off & you'll be fine in the morning. Choose Wisely!
Santa: My wife always tells me those three words. Banta: I love you? Santa: No, Stop Embarrassing Me!
Boss: I find it highly suspicious that you are only sick on weekdays. Santa: It must be my 'weekend' immune system!
Doctor: Who did this to you? Santa: Wife Doctor: Why? Santa: She complained that I don't lift even a finger to help her with housework. Doctor: Then? Santa: It seems I lifted the wrong finger!
At a Police Station: Santa: I want to talk to the thief who broke into my house last night. Police Officer: Why do you want to talk to him? Santa: I just want to know how he got into my house without waking up my wife. I've been trying it for years!
Doctors life goals: 1. Become a doctor 2. Marry a doctor 3. Make your kids doctor 4. Get them married to a doctor Engineer life goals: 1. Study engineering 2.Tell your siblings not to study engg. 3. Tell everyone not to study engg. 4. Die watching everyone choosing engg.
My wife & daughter are out of town. So finally, I am the man of the house!
Boy: Shaadi Karlo Mujhse.
Girl: Par Tum Toh Mere Bhai Jaise Ho.
Boy: Toh Phir Nikaah Karlo!
Santa: You love me or what?
Jeeto: Or what!
