Son: Dad, what happens when you die?
Dad: You go to heaven.
Son: No, I mean when YOU die. Will I get your stuff?
Waiter: How did you find your steak sir?
Customer: I just looked next to potatoes and there it was!
Whenever someone asks me why my room is a mess, I simply tell them that...
It's not a mess, it's an obstacle course designed to keep me fit!
English: Don't worry Mahesh.
Hindi: Mahsewari Mat Kar!
Never hurt a Samosa, Vada or Kachori by saying No...
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They too have 'fillings' inside!
The older I get the more I realise I love being at home doing nothing!
I wish every time I said something stupid to my wife, a red squiggly line appeared underneath!
You know when Donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking?
That's what it's like having kids!
The word queue is ironic.
It's just a 'q' with a bunch of silent letters waiting in a line!
School and College reunions are scams. Nobody misses you.
They just want to know if you have made it in life or not!