Love the lovers;
Byt play the players!
When visiting my house please remember: If you don't like dog hair, stay off the couch. To you I'm a dog, but here I'm the baby. They like me more than they like most humans. I live here, you are a guest. They love me, they're only friends with you. You will be sniffed, possibly licked, deal with it!
I wonder how much more advanced the world would be if we didn't require sleep!
Lighting a candle you bought is watching your money burn!
You realize you've grown when staying up late becomes a burden instead of an achievement!
Things money can't buy: 1. Manners 2. Morals 3. Respect 4. Character 5. Common Sense 6. Trust 7. Patience 8. Class 9. Integrity 10. Love
What do you call it when someone looks at your face and says you look good? Sarcasm!
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
The irony of Life: Remember those days when people used to write diaries and got mad when someone read them. Now they put everything on Facebook and get mad when people don't read them!
If you're not supposed to eat at midnight, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?