Clean Jokes

A Lady was conducting her anti drinking campaign outside a bar. A man came out of the Bar exuding alcohol fumes and the Lady said, "Reflect !!! If you arrive at the Gates of Heaven with your breath smelling of liquor...

Sometimes when shit happens, you want to be able to articulate the experience more than just you`ve, taken a shit. Here are some shit definitions to help you explain the situation better to your friends and family...

A very attractive young lady was sitting in a fine restaurant one night. Waiting for her date as she was, she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. So, as she bends down in her chair to get the mirror from her purse...

Ek Baar Rajinikanth Aur Kattappa Ki Mulaqat Ho Jaati Hai.
Rajinikanth: Tumhe Pata Hai Mere Gaon Mein Light Nahin Thi, Main Agarbatti Jalaakar Uski Roshni Mein Padta Tha.
Kattappa: Mere Gaaon Mein Toh Light Bhin Nahin Thi Aur Hamaare Paas Agarbatti...

After a brutal and tough day carrying the cross up Golgatha, the Romans nailed Jesus with no remorse to the heavy wooden structure. Golgatha was a grand hill, and as the cross was raised Jesus looked down upon all...

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down...

I went into the confessional box after years of being away from the Church. Inside I found a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On one wall, there`s a row of decanters with fine Irish whiskey and crystal glasses...

Notice on entry gate of a Apple Store in NY:
"Don`t ever fart here;
the smell will stay for ages.
We don`t have Windows!"
And Tit for Tat from Microsoft in their premises... "Anyone visiting us here can be free to use Windows in case you need to release stale gas from yesterday`s half eaten apple. We have been providing open window systems to the world since ages."

Ek Ladki Ki Nayi Nayi Shaadi Hui. Bahu Ka Mann Udaas Na Ho Issliye Sab Gharwaalo Ne Socha Uska Khaas Khayal Rakhenge. Subah-Subah Hi Sasur Bole: Aaj Se Tum Meri Bahu Nahi Beti Ho. Shaam Ko Saas Boli: Aaj Se...

Thekedar Se Setting Ho Jaane Ke Baad Clerk Ne Sahab Ko Bata Kar File Rakhi. Sahab Ne Likha "Approved".
Do Din Baad Thekedar Apne Vaade Se Mukar Gaya. Clerk Ne Sahab Ko Bataya. Sahab Bole...