This bloke just came into my workplace shouting "Vodka, tequila, Kahlua!"
I said "Hey! I call the shots round here!"
Life is good, have a beer!
Life sucks have a beer!
Beer is the 'sensible shoes' of the adult beverage world!
Yes, wine improves with age.
The older you get, the more you like it!
My boss told me that there is no such thing as problems, only opportunities.
I said, "That's great. Well, I have a serious drinking opportunity"!
Don't drink and drive, because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault!
Pro Tip:
Drink until she's beautiful, but stop before you ask her to marry you!
Listen drunk me & sober me are not the same person. So if drunk me said or did something, you need to take it up with drunk me.
Don't come at sober me because sober me wasn't there and don't know what happened between y'all!
Surround yourself with people who have issues.
Because these people always have alcohol!
If by bar-hopping you mean 'going to the garage fridge for a beer when you've run out inside' then yes, I still go bar-hopping!
You're all invited to my recycling party on Saturday at 8 PM.
Bring a bottle or a few cans!