What do you call it when a chameleon can't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction!
How do you cut the ocean in half?
Use a sea saw!
Why did a blind man fall into a well?
Because he couldn't see that well!
A man tried to sell me a coffin...
I told him that's the last thing I need!
Best one-liner ever:
"Can I call you back? My wife is driving!"
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
It wasn't peeling well!
How does NASA organize parties?
They planet!
What rooms do ghosts avoid?
The living rooms!
Helium walks into a bar, The bartender says "We don't serve noble gases in here."
Helium doesn't react!
What's blue that doesn't weigh much?
Light Blue!