What did the hamburger name it's baby?
Patty
What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant?
Swimming trunks!
What did Bacon say to Tomato?
Lettuce get together!
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Hot shower (n.) - a regular shower, but with me in it!
A girl to the X-ray technician after swallowing some coins by mistake, "Sir, do you see any change in me?"
Why did the poor dog chase his tail?
He was trying to make both ends meet!
What happened to the plant in Maths class?
It grew square roots!
What do you call a sick eagle?
Illegal!
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.